Suggest edit — NVC

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---
imported_by: wikihub-q7gz
scraped_at: 2026-01-30
source_gdoc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1uoQyGrv65mv09jkBCnNOlKlFfMS4mrNPClTk33UXeas
source_url: http://Nvc.jacobcole.net
title: NVC
visibility: public
---

[[systematicawesome]] \> [[nvc]]

Contact: <jacobcole4000@gmail.com>

NVC – Nonviolent Communication and Compassionate Communication

How to get into NVC and Compassionate Communication. “The language of life”... helps you connect with what’s alive in people even when it’s “negative” energy.

"The energy coming through people is, for me, a very beautiful divine energy. When I can really stay connected with it, I feel like I'm riding in a very precious flow of energy." ~Marshall Rosenberg \#NVC

See Also: [nvctranslator.com](http://nvctranslator.com) • [Compassionate Communication](https://www.now-here.global/compassionate-communication)

# [Feelings](https://www.notion.so/jacobblog/NVC-Feelings-List-58075cad8c0d4feba98b304a3a70036b?pvs=4) ([pdf](https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ONXFaI9jmFueV-AKbPmkInabmq7wQZzB/view?usp=drive_link)) and [Needs](https://www.notion.so/jacobblog/NVC-Needs-List-331dd10f8de04b85bea25793e3495752?pvs=4) ([pdf](https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ME6-TazgAXmskKTrmImft8EGgNKTBY2u/view?usp=drive_link)) Lists

# [NVC explained by Marshall Rosenberg \| Giraffe Language and Jackal Language – YouTube](https://youtu.be/Xov5z_GJ9Zs) (6 min) AMAZING

[Tips on How to Get Started](#h.sv47alx9aq7b)

[Tools](#h.204v7nozz44h)

[Great NVC Quotes](#h.38awots5ay3v)

[“...Do so only with the joy of a child feeding a duck…”](#h.24ijtwtllqvj)

[Guide (WIP)](#h.8i278jmikz4o)

[Resources](#h.d1frxzfksqtf)

[See also:](#h.koqup425h81j)

## Tips on How to Get Started

1.  Watch [Giraffe Language and Jackal Language \| Nonviolent Communication explained by Marshall Rosenberg - YouTube](https://youtu.be/Xov5z_GJ9Zs) (6 min) – AMAZING
2.  Read NVC, the [Book](https://www.amazon.com/Nonviolent-Communication-Language-Life-Changing-Relationships/dp/189200528X). [Audio book](https://www.audible.com/pd/Nonviolent-Communication-Audiobook/B00TJJNSQG?source_code=GPAGBSH0508140001&ipRedirectOverride=true&gclid=Cj0KCQjwsp6pBhCfARIsAD3GZuYe6W33IR5g5YbZpEIZzT0YC8RsStp48WwpnldDAfff0cOy9FoAenIaAkUCEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds), narrated by Rosenberg, is great (his voice exudes compassion). [Free Digital Copy](https://drive.google.com/file/d/1fvWlh6WGaN7-UccEgdTiISRKMcVOMqsK/view?usp=drive_link)

1.  And/or Watch the [AWESOME 2 hour Youtube talk by Marshall Rosenberg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7TONauJGfc&t=983s)

3.  Use this [feelings](https://www.notion.so/jacobblog/NVC-Feelings-List-58075cad8c0d4feba98b304a3a70036b?pvs=4) ([pdf](https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ONXFaI9jmFueV-AKbPmkInabmq7wQZzB/view?usp=drive_link)) and [needs](https://www.notion.so/jacobblog/NVC-Needs-List-331dd10f8de04b85bea25793e3495752?pvs=4) ([pdf](https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ME6-TazgAXmskKTrmImft8EGgNKTBY2u/view?usp=drive_link)) list

1.  Memorize the 5  categories feelings and 7 categories of needs

1.  Feelings: Sad Mad Glad Scared Numb
2.  Needs: Connection, Physical Well-Being, Integrity, Play, Peace, Autonomy, Meaning

2.  Save them to your home screen or desktop :)!

4.  See everything your brain says to you, the other person says to you, and you say to the other person through the lens of NVC, rephrase it in the language of NVC, the language of life!

### Tools

[nvctranslator.com](http://nvctranslator.com/)

Put texts you’re going to send into it

Put texts you’ve received that left you feeling defensive into this

WIP: iPhone Keyboard

[Highlights from NVC Translator Twitter Galler @nvctranslator](https://twitter.com/nvctranslator)

- E.g. “I feel like you don't need me in ur life. But I don't want to behave like a needy annoying person” -Translated to-\>  “I am grieving the possibility that I am not as an important person to you as I would like to be and at the same time feel concerned that I may come across as too demanding or burdening”

Help us with it :)! jacob+socialgood@ideaflow.io

### Great NVC Quotes

#### “...Do so only with the joy of a child feeding a duck…”

“Please do as I requested, only if you can do so with the joy of a little child feeding a hungry duck. Please do not do as I request if there is any taint of fear of punishment if you don't. Please do not do as I request to buy my love, that, is hoping that I will love you more if you do. Please do not do as I request if you will feel guilty if you don't. Please do not do as I request if you will feel shameful. And certainly do not do as I request out of any sense of duty or obligation.” ~Marshall B. Rosenberg

- \<\> "Please do this for me only if you can do it with all the delight of a child feeding a dog, because I don't want to have to pay for it later."

- <https://ideaflow.app/shared/FSEVwRn5rc>

### Guide (WIP)

- Rephrasing “should” as “is x in harmony with my needs”

- Sweet sadness/mourning when it is not → \#behaviorChange

- Distinguishing:

- ### Observations from Judgements

- ### Feelings from stories or “Pseudofeelings” (Agglomerations?)

- E.g.  instead of saying "I feel abandoned", which adds a story and a judgment on top of the feeling, we might say "I feel sad and lonely \[because my needs for connection and safety aren't met\]"

- #### ChatGPT NVC Translator Example

- Rephrase the following in NVC Language. Be careful to distinguish pseudofeelings from feelings. E.g. instead of saying "I feel abandoned", which adds a story and a judgment on top of the feeling, we might say "I feel sad and lonely \[because my needs for connection and safety aren't met\]"\
  Put the translation in \<nvcTranslation\>\</nvcTranslation\> List out observations feelings needs requests in a separate section below tagged as \<ofnr\>\</ofnr\>
- ChatGPT
- \<nvcTranslation\> I've noticed that we haven't had much contact recently, and I'm feeling a deep sense of sadness and loneliness. This is because I have a strong need for connection and a need to feel safe in our relationship. \</nvcTranslation\>\
  \<ofnr\> Observations: We haven't had much contact recently. Feelings: I'm feeling a deep sense of sadness and loneliness. Needs: I have a strong need for connection and a need to feel safe in our relationship. \</ofnr\>

- ###

- ### Needs from Strategies

- ### Requests from Demands

- Internal NVC on your internal monologue to transform it / cleanly break dialog

### Resources

3 Things That Nonviolent Communication Experts Suggest You \*Never\* Do in a Fight With a Friend  <https://apple.news/AE7Fjbl24SCuvCMlL-tKRdg>

### See also:

<https://twitter.com/appliedtao>

<https://www.notion.so/jacobblog/NVC-Guide-WIP-56d22fd34e844de992182d438ba1ee21?pvs=4>

<https://www.notion.so/NVCTranslator-com-ce88c10042c146aebb82d1071684062c?pvs=4>

<http://qigong.garden/>

---

*Source: <http://Nvc.jacobcole.net>*
*Google Doc: <https://docs.google.com/document/d/1uoQyGrv65mv09jkBCnNOlKlFfMS4mrNPClTk33UXeas>*
*Scraped: 2026-01-30*